All right, it’s almost time to open up, so let’s run through everything one more time. We’ve got a nice, slippery puddle of cola on the floor in front of the beverage dispenser?
We’ve got an array of miscellaneous foreign particles in all of our menu items – human hair, bone slivers, shards of Styrofoam, and so on?
The coffee is super hot? Remember, last week, several customers spilled coffee on themselves and didn’t even get scalded. You’re sure the coffee’s insanely hot?
We’re ready. Let ’em in.
No, this is not the daily employee drill at fast food restaurants and convenience stores all across America. The reality is quite the opposite.
Most staff members and supervisors are committed to customer safety and satisfaction, knowing that healthy, happy customers are customers who come back. No sane manager tries to alienate customers and solicit lawsuits against his employer.
Accidents do happen, mistakes are made, but these are aberrations, not matters of corporate policy.
Some customers, on the other hand, are just plain klutzes, wreaking havoc wherever they go and blaming others for their mishaps.
A few customers have devious minds and see dollars signs in simulated or self-inflicted injuries. They’ll step in puddles for the very purpose of slipping in them. They’ll even produce the puddles themselves, to have something to slip in.
They’ll bring foreign objects into a restaurant, insert them into the food they’ve been served, and then say they found them there. They’ll pour coffee on themselves and insist the beverage holder was defective and the coffee too hot.
Amanda Cardoza has alleged she scalded herself while pouring her own cup of coffee at the self-service counter of the Petro Shopping Center the day after Christmas in 2010. Two years later, last Christmas, she filed suit in Jefferson County District Court, accusing the Petro owners of negligence and malice.
Since then the defendants claim she’s the blame and she was at fault.
The real fault here is that this suit is still in court. With Christmas approaching, all we can say is ho, ho, ho.